Lately
by dixiekittyva
Summary: Sequel to 'I Will Always Love You'. Time has passed and Tommy is determined to get his girl back. But will she take him back? Could they ever truly make it work? Read to find out...


**Okay, you asked for it, now here it is... the sequel to _I Will Always Love You_. It may end up a three parter, maybe more or this may be the end of it. I haven't really decided yet. I hope you all enjoy it! And be sure to show the love. PEACE!!!**

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**_Lately (Dreaming 'Bout Babies) By Tracy Byrd_**

**I used to think I had it made,  
Every time we said goodnight.  
This little dating game we've played,  
Has always seemed to feel all right.  
I've had my privacy and your heart on a string.  
And it's never been my style to ruin a good thing.**

Three months. That's how long she's been gone, three months. Well, three months, six days, five hours and twenty-two minutes... Well, now twenty-three minutes. That's how pathetic I am, I know how long she's been gone down to the minute. If I hadn't had to replace the battery in my watch, I could probably tell you how long it's been down to the second. That's how much I miss her. Every second without her has been complete torture. She seriously has no clue what she does to me. She won't talk to me anymore. Sure, she called a few times right after she got to New York, but within a few weeks it all changed. Soon she started calling less and less, never returning my call and before long she started ignoring my calls completely. It wasn't too long after that she had her cell phone cut off altogether. She swore she would always be there, always just a phone call away, but now she won't even talk to me. Not that I blame her of course. She had every reason to go, I never gave her many reasons to stay.

I truly just want her to be happy. But how can she? How can she be happy after walking away from everything she ever wanted... well, ALMOST everything she ever wanted. There were things she wanted that I didn't give her, that I couldn't give her. Not then at least. Then I was still holding onto my old lifestyle, I just wasn't ready to "settle down". I just wasn't ready to grow up. But that was a long time ago...

**Oh, but lately,  
I've been thinking 'bout a change of plans;  
Maybe get a couple wedding bands,  
And do something crazy.  
Maybe get a piece of land and see,  
If we could start a little family tree.  
Well, I don't know what's gotten into me,  
But I've been dreamin' 'bout babies.**

So, here I sit at thirty-seven thousand feet, and big surprise, I'm thinking about her. Actually, I'm going to see her. Hopefully, with any luck... well I'm sure it'll take a whole LOT of luck, and maybe, just maybe she'll actually take me back. Once she walked out of my door none of it seemed to matter anymore... not any of our silly fights, not any of our so-called "problems", none of our friends, not work. None of it... especially work. Honestly, they were probably about an inch away from firing me as it was. But I'll get to that later.

Now though... Well, now the only thing that matters to me is her. When she left I realized that all of those things that she was wanting... no, needing from me is actually what I want, what I need from her. It's sad, it took her leaving for me to realize that for the first time in my life that I actually need someone. It's not an easy thing to accept, but if there has to be someone that I need to function... to survive... to have any chance at having a semi-normal life, I'm glad it's her.

I seriously can't imagine my life anyone else. And the fact that I might have to someday... well, it's scares the shit out of me. All I want is to take her into my arms and never let go.

I always thought it was degrading to get down on one knee for a woman... Well, not degrading exactly, but you get the idea. It seemed too much like begging for my liking. And Tom Quincy doesn't beg for anything, especially women. They come to me, and not the other way around. Ha! At least that's what I used to think. But now... I'll beg, but only for her, that is. Hell, I'd crawl on my hands and knees if that's what it takes.

What can I say, I love her... Isn't that how it's supposed to be? Wait, no, you're supposed to realize how much you love the girl and make her yours, not continually hurt her... not repeatedly break her heart into a thousand pieces... and most definitely never EVER let her think that she's not what you want, what you need... the only thing that makes you complete.

So, once again, here I sit, my leg bouncing all over the place and my hands nervously fumbling with a small black box... and I'm not a nervous person. Just ask anyone who knows me, Tom Quincy DOES NOT get nervous. But there's just one exception that rule that no one but me knows about, one that should be painfully obvious by now... her.

**I know it can be hard these days,  
To be a family man.  
I know that all the experts say:  
"You need to live life while you can."  
I've heard psychology on what makes "true love" true,  
And I've read the books on educated points of view.**

I guess all along I was just scared... Scared that I wouldn't be good enough, that I would screw up, that I would once again let her down. To be completely honestly, she's the only person I've ever tried to be better for. But naturally, in my strive for excellence in her eyes, I continually let her down. Just ask Portia, I was a terrible husband. And while I know I could never, and I mean NEVER, cheat on Jude, I'm sure I would end up doing something completely stupid to screw it up. Oh and look... I've already done that one. I ruined everything when I let the fear take over my life, and let my whole world walk out that damn door. Damn those self-fulfilling prophecies...

**Oh, but lately,  
I've been listening more to Dr. Seuss,  
Reading up on Mother Goose,  
Seems she's quite a lady.  
I've been seeing lots of pinks and blues,  
An' little bitty tennis shoes.  
Hearing: "Goodnight Daddy, I love you"'s.  
Yeah, I've been dreamin' 'bout babies.**

But it's not just the loss of Jude that I've been grieving... it's everything that we could've had. Everything that we hopefully still can have. Jude always thought that despite my constant reassurances, deep down I didn't really want a family, that I wasn't ready for it all. She was so sure that I wasn't ready for that kind of commitment, for that big of a responsibility. She will never know how wrong she was.

Actually, I've always wanted to be a dad. I've imagined the big house full of kids running all over the place. I've dreamt of a very pregnant Jude setting the table for dinner (even if in reality she can't even cook instant oatmeal) while I'm playing catch with a little boy who looks just like I did when I was his age. I've dreamt of quietly walking into the nursery to watch Jude rocking our youngest to sleep in her arms while she softly lulls him or her to sleep with a sweet lullaby.

Hell, I've even yearned for the not so perfect times... Like when you and your wife haven't had any alone time in weeks and when you finally think everyone's asleep and you two can be together like you haven't been in god knows how long, a sudden clash of thunder and lightning sends a couple pairs of tiny feet running into your room before flying onto the bed between the two of you. Oh, well, just another day in paradise you think to yourself. And the funny thing is... I really think it would be. But Jude could never understand that, well, she could never truly believe that I really felt that way.

**I used to dream of fancy foreign cars,  
And black tie affairs.  
And how we'd live in separate condos,  
While we climbed the golden stairs.**

But I guess there was SOME truth to her fears. It wasn't that I didn't want to trade in the Viper or Porsche for a minivan like she used to joke about. (Honestly, I would never give up the Viper. Who knows, for her I just might have. But we have the Hummer and that's much safer than any dorky minivan...) And it wasn't that I thought that I wasn't ready. Truthfully, it was that I thought that WE weren't ready. And when you stop to think about it, we really weren't. For one thing, weren't married yet... YET being the operative word. Truthfully, I've had this ring in my pocket for months now, just waiting for the perfect moment to ask. Sadly, there just wasn't time or there is just no such thing as the perfect moment. I've screwed so many things up in my life, do so many things the wrong way, but she has always been the one thing that I wanted to be different. I always wanted to do everything the right way with her, from waiting months after we started dating before we took the next step and finally made love to even asking Stuart's permission before asking her to move in with me. I even talked to him before I went ring shopping. I wanted her to be the one thing I did right in my life. So naturally, for her, I would want to be married before we started our family.

Next, there's our careers of course. Granted, I know Jude would gladly give it all up to be a mom, but I could never let her do that. She loves her music too damn much to just quit, she would just end up regretting it years down the road. But I always knew what mattered most to her, I just wanted to wait until after her next tour was over with, the tour that is only mere weeks away. Being pregnant and being on tour are two things that should never mix... Being sick and stuck on a tour bus would not be a pleasant experience to say the least.

And then there's me... In my strive to be perfect for her I somehow dug myself into a hole so deep that I was starting to feel very claustrophobic. Work was simply suffocating me. I should never have agreed to take on so much. All I ever wanted was just to sit across from that beautiful blond and listen to her serenading me through the glass all day long. But no, my stupid ego took over once again. Once more way to make her proud of me, to see how much I had changed and grown up, I thought. In reality, I was in WAY over my head. Unfortunately, I realized the error of my ways a little too late. I'm still a VP at G-Major of course, but now I have a little more help. After Jude left I swallowed my pride (not that I had much left after she walked out) and went to the board and told them I needed help... desperately. Thankfully, they took my advice and made Sadie (a business world super-woman in my eyes. I mean really, is there anything she can't handle?!) my co-vice-president. I handle all of the creative aspects and she takes care of the business end of keeping G-Major running.

Her and Kwest have really kept me together and somewhat sane these past few months since Jude has been gone. I was a total wreck for weeks after she left, but they pulled me through it and out of my despair. They reminded me how many people were counting on me, so of course, I threw myself back into my work. Anything to keep me from thinking of her. Big mistake. Once I finally realized how crazy I had been for thinking I could handle it all, I went to the G-Major board and did what any true leader would, I asked for help. Sadie was naturally surprised (well, shocked would be a more accurate description) when I gave her the good news.

But seriously, I wouldn't have made it these past three months without her and my longtime best friend. Sometimes they'll give me an update of how Jude's doing in New York or how her new album is coming along. And judging by her last single, I know they're right, she's doing just fine without me. But I can't help but think that they're keeping something from me, like when I got their last "status report" on her last week, it just felt like they were holding back. I know that there's more to it, more that they're not telling me. What if she has really moved on? What is she has already found someone else?... Someone who's not constantly letting his fear get the best of him and who is truly making her happy?

I try to push those thoughts aside as I push my way through the crowded airport. No, she loves me, she has to. She even told me so herself. It's too soon, there's no way she could've replaced me already. She just couldn't have, could she? I swear, I'm beginning to go crazy. If keep arguing with myself, I know I'm going to end up being committed. There's only one person who can put my mind at ease and I'll be seeing her in a few hours. Hopefully, there won't be some guy hanging all over her that I'll have to beat up... No one messes with my girl, no one.

**Oh, but lately,  
I've been thinking that it makes more sense,  
To build a house with a picket fence,  
Forget the Mercedes.  
Get some puppy-dogs and training wheels,  
And a family Oldsmobile.  
I can't believe just how good it feels,  
To be dreamin' 'bout babies. **

I found out that she'll be attending some charity ball tonight, something about saving the whales or the dolphins or something like that, I can't remember. Her commitment for putting her fame to good use is just one more of the MANY things I love about her.

You know, you wouldn't think that it would be so hard to find out how to find a superstar like her, but surprisingly enough, everyone has been very tight lipped about her. I swear, I went to everyone we know and no one would tell me where to find her. Once again, I kept getting that eerie feeling that everyone knew something that I didn't. Finally, after repeated bouts of begging and pleading, Mason finally caved in. I always knew he would eventually. He had always been a softy, especially when it came to Jude. He always knew how much she loved me over the years, even when she was still denying it, especially to herself.

I'm now pacing back and forth off the side of the stage, waiting for my big introduction. It's not that I'm nervous about performing. Granted, this will my first time performing in years and the last time I did was with her for yet another charity. No, instead I'm more afraid of what her reaction will be. What if she really has moved on? What if she finally realized that I'm not worth the effort or even worth her time? I always knew that I wasn't good enough for her, what if she finally realized it too?! What if this isn't enough to make her see how serious I truly am about making this work... about us being a real family?

So, finally, the big moment has arrived. I hear my name and I slowly climb the few steps leading up to the stage. At first I just look at the floor as I feel hundreds of eyes staring a hole through me, though the only ones I care about are hers. I slowly lift my head as the music finally begins. I wave at the crowd, but now my eyes are on the back of the large ballroom, I'm still to chicken to look for her... Still afraid of what or who I might find.

As I start to sing, I finally muster up enough courage to scan the room for her. He only take a moment before our eyes finally lock. Thankfully, everyone else at her table is at least fifteen years older than her, so I don't have any "date" to worry about. Obviously surprised to see me, she has a look of shock and utter amazement, but there's also something else. Is she actually smiling? Is she actually happy to see me?

I continue to pour my heart out to her, my eyes never leaving hers as she never looks away from me either. I know that look, I can tell she's thinking things over, replaying memories in her mind as if it were a movie that only she could see. I'm not sure if it's a good sign or not, but at least she's still here, she hasn't gotten up and left yet... once again, yet. I'm sure she will, it's only a matter of time... just give her a minute or two.

As I finish the song and the music slowly begins to fade, I finally break the intense stare that we've been sharing since I first found her in the large crowd. I look down at the floor before looking back up at the now applauding audience before me. I smile and wave at them, selfishly using the support to boost my confidence even further. Maybe I can do this after all.

As the applause dwindles and people start to sit back down, I finally being to speak again. "Thank you. Really, that means more to me than you will ever know, especially since I haven't performed in a REALLY long time." I chuckle softly as I try to lighten the mood, but I still see the tears that are threatening to fall from her eyes. "But to be completely serious for a moment... That song was called 'Lately'. I wrote it for a beautiful young woman who is sitting out there amongst you all tonight. One who stole my heart many years ago. She never really knew just how much I loved her, how much I wanted her beside me for the rest of my life. Hopefully, now she has at least some idea. Jude, would you come up here for a moment please?"

A look of pure panic and horror flashes over her face, but she doesn't move. I flash her the sad puppy eyes, the one thing she could never resist, and I knew it, which makes it all the more dangerous. "Please?" I sweetly ask. She still doesn't move, but I can tell she's unsure of what to do, as if she wants to stand up but is glued to her seat.

Thankfully, I had been given a wireless mic this evening so leaving the stage isn't a problem."Fine, I'll come to you then..." I softly speak as I climb down from the stage, not very gracefully I might add. As I walk over to her, the look of horror has been replaced by a look of amusement, thanks to my awkward descent from the stage I'm sure. As I reach her, she stays seated, but looks up at me with look of happiness mixed with confusion and there's something else... Is that love? Does she still love me? I sure hope so or else I'm about to make a huge fool out of myself. Not like it would be the first time I made a fool out of myself for her of course.

I take her hands into mine as I sit down beside her so I can look into her eyes and I begin to speak again ."Jude, I know I've been an idiot. I know I've let you down, time and time again, but you have to know that I never meant to. All I have ever wanted since the day we met was just to love you and keep you with me forever. Baby, I'm not perfect, no where near it actually, and I know I will probably continue to screw up again and again. But I couldn't live the rest of life without at least giving this another try... giving us another try. I have loved you from the moment I first laid eyes on you. Well, actually, it was the first time I heard you speak. You called me lame... No, you called me really, really lame." We both smiled and couldn't help but laugh. Really, how many people fall in love or even like each other after an insult like that. "And that's when I knew. You were so unlike any woman I had ever met, I knew you were definitely something special. Over the years my love for you has grown as day by day we got closer and closer. Every stolen moment, every late night stuck in the studio, every kiss, every stupid fight... All of it leading to this moment right now. I have been a complete wreck without you, I'm sure your sister told you that much. But I want you to know that you were wrong."

I knew that would get her attention, and it did. She looked at me completely confused, lost as to where I was going with this. "You were wrong when you thought we weren't right for each other, when you thought we didn't want the same things... when you thought I wasn't ready for us to start a family. You were wrong because all along I wanted the same things you did, I just thought the timing was wrong. I wanted to do this the right way." I get down on knee, never breaking eye contact as I pull the small box out of my jacket pocket.

The tears she has been holding back start to fall freely as she realizes what's about to happen. I smile and once again continue my well rehearsed speech. "Jude, you are the only person I have ever wanted to share my life with. And, I mean every moment of my life, the good and the bad. We have been through so much together over the years. I want to fall sleep with you next to me every night and wake up to your sweet, although grumpy, face every morning. I want to spend the next fifty plus years doing everything in my power to make you happy. I want all of it... the house, the kids, the dog and the three cats that you always talked about. I want it all... But I only want it if I can have it with you. Without you I've completely useless. So..." I open the box and her hands jump to her face as she's all out sobbing now. "Will you, Jude Elizabeth Harrison, make me the happiest man in the world and agree to be my wife? Jude, honey, will you marry me?!"

She opens her mouth to speak but no words come out. I can't believe it, someone has finally made Jude Harrison speechless, now this is one for the record books. "Jude?" She can tell I'm starting to get nervous again as I stare up at her expectantly, with what I hope is a hopeful and not a worried look on my face. As the tears continue to fall from her face, she finally smiles at me and shakes her head yes before she is finally able to squeak out the words. I'm sure my eyes almost popped out of my head as I almost couldn't believe that she would actually agree to marry me... the biggest screw-up on the planet. I quickly stand up, pulling her into my arms as my lips crash down onto hers.

I hold her to me tightly as now I'm the one who's now crying. It takes me a moment, but I soon realize that there's something different about her. Maybe she's just been eating better. I mean, I could tell she had filled out a little more as I watched her from the stage, but now holding her in my arms, I can really feel... Wait a minute... Is she? I feel her tense in my arms as I do the same, she realizes that I figured it out. So, THIS is why wouldn't talk to me the past few months. I pull back and look her in the eyes. She shies away from my gaze because she knows what's next. "Are you...?" I trail off, almost in disbelief that something this great could actually be real, that what I had felt is actually what I hope it is. She looks back at me and sadly nods. "You mean we're...?" This time she cuts me off before I finish my question. Once again, she sadly nods, but this time she also speaks. "Yes, we are... I'm sorry, Tommy.."

Wait, is she actually apologizing?! "Girl, what do you have to be sorry for? We're having a baby! That's great news!" I almost shout as I pull her back into my arms again, this time more careful of the small but noticeable baby bump. She looks up at me confused. "Really? You mean you're actually happy about this?" Now, grinning from ear to ear, I look back down at her as I answer. "Of course I am. I'm gonna be a daddy!" No wonder everyone had been acting so weird, everyone knew but me as I'm sure she swore them all to secrecy. But knowing her, threatened them to secrecy is probably more like it.

As we continue to hold onto each other we hear applause, suddenly realizing where we are again. I look around the room and shout it out loud for everyone to hear. "I'm gonna be a daddy!!!" Jude just laughs into my chest as she pulls me even tighter.

Eventually, she pulls away and looks up at me with a teary smile. "I'm so sorry for everything. I never should've left." Wiping her tears away with my thumbs, I shake my head and softly reply "No, you had every reason to go. I'm the one who should be sorry, and I am. I am so sorry for everything that I put you through." She pulls me close again and sweetly speaks those sweet words I've been dreaming of everyday since she left. "I love you, Tommy..." As I smile, I lean down and kiss the top of her head. "I love you too, Girl... more than you could ever imagine."

You wouldn't believe how great it feels just to hold her once again. I've been dreaming of this moment for a really long time now. Now I finally have everything I've ever wanted... I have Jude back and in a few months we'll be starting our own little family. Standing here, I realize that I'm holding my whole world in my arms... the woman I love and the life that we created together. I'm finally doing something right for a change, something that I will never regret, something that will make me truly happy. Well, it's about time that something went right. Now, everything I've dreamt of is finally going to come true and lately, I've been dreaming about babies.

**I can't believe just how good it feels,  
No. **


End file.
